I’ve decided to stop eating and playing till 2007. Please, let nobody beg me. Anyone who does is stupid. Anyway, “that is not an indictment but an advice.” The only thing that can make me change my mind is, well, if nobody begs me.

I had always thought “playing” and “eating” were the normal ways kids grow. Until I read the story of 15-year-old Funmilola Akintayo and 10-year-old Ebuka Ochichi. The former was set ablaze by her mum for “playing too much.” And the latter bathe with hot oil by his aunty for “eating too much.”

I played a lot, as a kid. All manners. With football, tins, sticks, etc. I even played “House” – always the bossy dad. Sometimes, my father scolded me “for playing in the sand” and my mum added a few words because I would not settle to eat. But none ever burnt me for playing or eating. Even as an adult, I “eat and play.” Who doesn’t? Some even do not only “play,” they do it in shapes and forms. They “play around,” for instance. Which makes me wonder about the type of play that earned Funmi a “frying” treatment. What manner of humans would “cook” kids for living their childlike time – as programmed by nature? Did Funmi’s mum ever play as a child? Did Ebuka’s aunt ever eat to her fill?

Today, eating and playing have become a metaphor of life. Those who are afraid of being seen as failures hide the fact that they like everyone else, play. They go about with frozen faces. And if they venture to smile, it turns to grimace. Sometimes, only at the sight of money – their perceived symbol of success and seriousness. With the money, they “eat” all sorts. The more they eat, the more they desire more to “eat”. Victims of greed, they soon “eat” even the money that wasn’t meant for them. And that’s where problem comes.

Check out all the Senate presidents of this era. From Evan(s) Enwerem, Chuba Okadigbo (late), Pius Anyim to Adolphus Wabara. All became controversial, either because they “played too much” or because the “ate too much.” Enwerem was accused of ineptitude – meaning that he “played” with the serious issues of senate leadership. Oyi was accused of “eating too much.” Anyim fell out with Aso Rock because he wasn’t the “playful” type. Seen as uncompromising, too serious, the executive wanted him out. And Wabara has made the books as another Senate President who likes “eating.” And the issue is not about “macaroni.”

All the while, the lawmakers have been sharing money. None of them sent me a kobo. On weekly basis, they steal from our collective purse. But the day some of them get the smaller share, they call the press to complain. So that we would publish it and rubbish the other. Did they remember the press when the share was larger? Wabara’s problem with his colleagues, put in proper perspective, is that he “ate too much.” No matter what he says N1.7million can’t be compared to N39million. But then, N1.7million can’t be compared to N0.00 which they left for me and my kind.

I once had an English teacher who kept saying, “too much of everything is a disease.” When Nigerians cry out, it’s because of “too much” hardship. When the opposition organises a mass rally, it’s because the misrule is getting “too much.” It means dictatorship submerges the principles of democracy. When state agents paid with the peoples’ money are unleashed on the masses, to pump teargas into their lungs, that is terrorism. It’s even poor thinking for the government that thumps its chest that the supposed mass action failed. The mere fact that it was contemplated alone tells that despotism in the system is “too much.” Just as kids who play and eat “too much” get rebuked, so should those in power who abuse their offices. 

Right now, there’s “too much” hunger in the land. “Too much” joblessness, frustration, insecurity, insensitivity from leaders. Sorry, rulers! For, if we had leaders, they would’ve noticed by now that we’re not following them. They would observe that there’s “too much” gap between them and us. “Too much” space between the haves and the have-nots. But our rulers simply march on, trampling us with jackboots leftover by the military. They tried to deceive us with their agbada. But we spot the boot all the same. A mis-match, this government does everything to the extreme.

 When Obasanjo attempts a joke for instance, he takes it too far. On the presidential media chat, where serious national issues are supposed to be tackled, Obasanjo reduces them to a mockery. Yet, he called NLC’s action against fuel price hike a joke taken too far. And last week, his aides jeered at the opposition, claiming the mass action was a “flop.” If the public support for an action is an indication of “flop” or not, then we now know how the government rates. For, hardly any action by Obasanjo’s regime has gotten mass backing. Is it the fuel price hike? Is it privatisation? |The sale of government properties? The hosting of All African Games and CHOGM? Is it the mass rigging of elections? Is it dollar-salary for “super ministers”? None! Because Obasanjo, each time, does not only “eat” too much, he bites more than he can chew.  

Now, I’ve decided to wait for another band of “eaters” in 2007. As usual, they would come “playfully”. Then, when then grab the reins of power, they begin to plunder the national coffers. If we dare complain, they whip us with thorns. And suffocate us with gas – both tear and poisoned types combined. Simply because they see our own mass “display,” I mean, protest – as “playing too much”. A joke taken too far. Only by Obasanjo’s standard.

FROM MY MAILBOX

River of blood

You were right, sir, on your piece entitled “Farming ideas and terrorism.” But, can the Federal Government “fish” out the terrorists, or how long will it take the political leadership of the country to “fish” out the assassins? Why is it that if armed robbers attack a bullion van, escape with the money and in the process of the robbers kill a police escort, it would not take the police a month or more to “fish” out the robbers from wherever they may be hiding? Why is it taking the FG and the police 430years, which the children of Israel spent in Egypt, to track down the killers that have been gunning down Nigerians. What we hear today is that strange bullets killed Chief Dikibo. Just as strange bullets from the FG kill the innocent citizens almost everyday. This democracy is fast turning to a river of blood.

ThankGod Isiguzoro <Kelechi42003@yahoo.co.uk>

Paralysed  system

You are really doing a good job. This government is a paralysed; so I am not surprised that all the policies it has been initiating are paralysed. To make things worse, it has been hijacked by a mafia, all in the name of politicking. 

 “hilary okadigbo” <hilaryosolase_okadigbo@yahoo.com>  

 They kill to cover their paths

They’ve caused the youth to be ill mannered and ill educated from infancy then punish them for the crimes they were ‘doctored’ to commit.  When “adders”, “cobras”, “pythons”, barons, cultists,  murderers, and convicts all feed in the same “pot” there  must be cannibalism. They kill to cover their paths, so expect more killings.

 “segun odepidan” <segunpidan@yahoo.com>

• First published in Saturday Sun of May 08, 2004