Blind Respect is Killing Us.
Sometimes, I don’t know what is wrong with my head. That is, beyond the grey hair. You see, after the launch of last week’s Book of Revelations,written by Obasanjo and…
My Lord, This Thing Runs in the Family
Some “total idiots,” who call themselves journalists have been analyzing the shape of Gbenga Obasanjo’s head. As if it’s bigger than mine. Since Monday, when the young man’s picture “graced”…
I Play Better Football in the Bedroom
I had always suspected there was something wrong with my head. Last night, I found out at the barber’s. After about 30 minutes under the guy’s pincher, which he claimed…
There’s No Fool Like Me
Until last week, I thought I deserved an award. I had confessed to my wife, recently, that I was corrupt. I cheated her once or twice at a Ludo game,…
My Fingers Give Me Short Temper
I’ve a very short temper. Well, I’ve never measured it with a ruler but I’ve proof from the doctors. Very little things make me mad and I go breaking a…
Too Many Jobless Ghosts Around
Until October 23, 2005, Lisa was a sleepy community. It slept when civilization started; and even slept through a plane crash. But not anymore. Now, day or night, Lisa has…
A Deregulated Father Christmas
I can smell Christmas in the air. But it’s a truly confusing scent. Sometimes, it smells like “okrika;” other times I smell “ready made” wears from a decent boutique. Then,…
My Sallah Ram Has Been Liquidated
I’ve been thinking of how to escape the burden of January. Just one week into it and I’m as broke as Charly Boy’s PMAN. All my calculations fail to add…
Listen! Everyone Is Singing
I’ve tried singing a few times and it’s been s-o-o-o helpful. Anybody who knows me very well, especially my mirror, would tell you I don’t sing often. Unless, when I…
State of Emergency in My Soup Pot
This morning, I’ll walk into a police station and declare a state of emergency. And why not? That I lost a priced possession needs an “urgent” attention. And if the…