Go to London and Die!
My daughter just loves jingles. For instance, once AIT signature tune starts, she surfaces before the TV set – prancing like a calf. Super Story, Binta and Friends, etc also…
Opportunities in Baba’s Chicken Library
Last week, I heard of possible job opportunities, so I jumped on the next bicycle out of Lagos. Friend: General Obasanjo is about building a new library. That means more…
Journalists for Sixth Term
Today, I’m leading a delegation to Abuja. To move my pocket, sorry, the nation forward. You see, I like action. Like slapping people around and living happily ever after. Or…
Obasanjo’s Egg-cellent Indictment
A bull fighter, wearing General Olusegun Obasanjo’s face and adire, filled our tv screens Wednesday, October 8. There was no telepromter, so he didn’t stare at us like on October…
Now, Let’s Cushion Ignorance
My little nephew returned from school the other day calling me a fool. As if I was in El-Rufai’s National Assembly. My offence? His kindergarten teacher flogged him because he…
Every Idiot Needs a NAFDAC Number
Anybody who claims he’s not an idiot should raise his hand. Did I see one up? You must be “a half idiot” for trying to defend yourself. Imagine! Was he…
IBB Should Pose Nude Like Anita
I’ve always wondered what I’d look like, if I posed nude. But each time I try, the camera gets shy. It smiles slyly, blinks repeatedly, then switches off. The other…
A Word of Caution for IBB
I don’t know if the one we call “Maradona” will “walk” or “run” in 2007. Some say he’s an “evil genius.” But if we’re talking the presidential race, there must…
Heat From Aso Rock
Whoever says Nigeria is not progressing should be tied to a broomstick. And shot dead with a water-gun. We are moving. Backwards, of course. That explains why we have a…
If Attah Was a Hangman…
If you’re one of those wondering why Nigeria has scarcity of everything – security, food, justice, morality, good leaders, etc – then you haven’t heard the latest. Please, don’t tell…